Decode
by bloomgirl468
Summary: A future CB fic! After chuck and blair broke up before college. Blair decided she neeeded to build a new life and that meant cutting ties from her UES gang. Little did she know she'd build a new life.. what happens when it comes up in flames and shes back


_**It has been four years since I have been in contact with my friends and family from the UES. I only kept in contact with Serena. I spent my last night in the UES with the man, I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with; Chuck Bass. I remember the night like it just had happened.**_

_Flashback:_

"_Blair, do you honestly think you and I will last four years? We can't do a long distance relationship." Chuck spoke with tears brewing in his eyes while he looked up at me from his desk._

_I wipe the tears that are falling from my eyes._

"_Well I guess you're right. Have a nice life Bass."_

_I snapped trying to hold back anymore tears as I grab my Dolce bag he had purchased me for graduation and walked out of his office. Little did I know I would never have stepped back in that office let alone back into Chuck Bass' life._

_**When Chuck and I decided to end our relationship I did what any normal adolescent teenage girl going off to college would do; I cut ties with my friends awaiting a new life that was for me at Yale. I even had to cut ties with my life long friend Serena. I was naïve and did not want to have any ties to the UES. My first year was one to remember. I met my life long friend and roommate Sophia James.**_

_Flashback_

_This was it. I finally was here at Yale__,__ where I dreamed about being since I was a little girl with Daddy. My mother, Dorota, and Cyrus all came to help me begin my new life outside of the Upper East Side__,__ and especially a life that did not involve the one man I wanted to share this experience with._

_  
"Blair dear, I believe that young girl over there by the bushes is your roommate?" My mother questioned._

_I laughed as I took some of my luggage outside of the limo._

"_How do you even know what she looks like when I don't?" _

"_Darling she is holding a sign" She smiled as she pointed behind me._

_I decided to turn around and see who my mother was talking about. When I did I saw a beautiful red head holding a sign that read B. Waldorf it's me your roommate Sophia James! I laughed and waved my hand to her. When I did she came skipping over to us._

"_Well looks like we finally have met. Nice to meet you roomie." Sophia extended her hand to me._

"_Looks like this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship" I laughed as I shook her hand._

_Later on that night when we got our room all set up and my mother & co went home Sophia and I decided to order in some Chinese and have a movie night._

"_So Blair, tell me how was your life back in the Upper East Side?" Sophia asked as she spooned more fried rice out on her plate._

_I sighed as eighteen years of my life flashed right back. Times with Serena and me, Nate and me, and most importantly Chuck and I flooded into my head. _

"_You can say it was extremely out there."_

_I said with a fake laugh not wanting to really talk about everyone from back home._

"_I can only imagine. Hell anything is out there compared to the Hicksville I lived in." _

_We both giggle. When Sophia got up from my bed to throw her plate out I noticed an envelope sticking out from my bag. I reached out for my bag and took it out. It was marked Blair._

"_A note from a friend?"_

_I smiled up at her with tears forming in my eyes knowing who exactly this letter was from._

"_Sophie I'm just going to go to the bathroom. Want to get the popcorn ready?"_

_She smiled. She knew stuff had to be kept private._

"_Of course girly! I have to say I am excited to see Breakfast at Tiffany's for the first time ever!"_

_I laughed as I headed out the door and headed into the bathroom. I noticed an empty stall and took a seat. I pulled the letter out from my robe pocket and opened it. _

_**Blair, **_

_**I know I haven't called or stopped by since the incident in my office. To be honest with you B we've been through a hell of a lot these past two years. Since we were kids, and our scheming then the night at Victrola happened. The night I realized that I had always loved you but I didn't want to ruin what you and Nate had. I realized when we first started our "thing" I could love. You made me want to be a better man Blair. You love me for who I am not a cookie cutter version of me. When my dad died and I told you not to follow me, you did anyways. You stood by me like you said that day by the limo when you declared your love for me. Blair, you showed me that I can be loved. Then we decided to become exclusive and I have to say I was the happiest boy in the world. You helped me heal, you made me whole again. I love you. I told you we shouldn't be together right now because we need to fulfill our dreams. I don't want to hold you back especially since you have dreamed of going to Yale your whole life. I guess what I am trying to say is, if two people are meant to be they will find each other in the end. I'm going to miss you Baby. Please have fun. Enjoy your time Blair you deserve it more than anyone else. **_

_**I love you Blair,**_

_**Chuck.**_

_I wipe the tears that are cascading from my eyes as I closed Chuck's letter and go up from the toilet seat._

"_Suck it up Blair."_

_I whisper to myself as I open the door and head back to my room. When I got back I saw Sophie on my bed reading Vogue while munching on the hot popcorn._

"_Hey you okay?" She asked me with worry and concern_

_I smile up at her_

"_Not really." _

_She patted the seat on the bed._

"_Come darling"_

_I laugh as I keep wiping the tears away and take a seat next to Sophie._

"_You know what I do whenever I'm sad? I take a fortune cookie and open it and let it help me with my future." She said as she handed me the cookie._

_I look up at her and smile as I crack open the cookie._

"_What does it say?"_

"_Be patient. A bright future awaits you."_

_Sophie giggled "Oh yes it does my friend, yes it does"_

_**That night was the start of something new. I realized Chuck was right. If two people are meant to be together they will find their way in the end. We both needed to fulfill our dreams because we never would know if we'd end up regretting not doing them. Sophie and I became insuperable, she reminded me a lot of Serena but I didn't feel the need to match Sophie for the spotlight. We both understood each other and that was an amazing part of the recipe for a friendship. S and I haven't talked in over three months. Sure she called me non stop but I couldn't deal with everyone so I ignored her calls and told my mother to tell her that I needed time. This definitely wasn't her fault but I had to find who I was during this college journey. I hit a good spot in my journey when Sophie introduced me to her classmate Evan Mathews.**_

_Flashback:_

_I was walking to my English 101 class in the campus center when I ran into Sophie who was sitting on a bench selling Yale sweatshirts with a gorgeous blonde boy._

"_Blair!" She chirped as I walk towards the two._

"_I didn't know you were selling 20 dollar sweatshirts" I state picking one up and feeling the material of it._

_She laughed "Ha ha ha silly! This is my classmate Evan Mathews. Our business professor assigned us a project on who in the class could sell more sweatshirts by the end of the day"_

_I looked up at Evan who had his eyes locked on mine the entire time. Boy was he gorgeous with his blue eyes and that blonde short hair._

"_Hi, Evan I'm Blair Waldorf__.__" I smiled_

_Sophia noticed how nervous he was and nudged his shoulder. He was out of his nervous trance and raised his hand._

"_Blair Waldorf it is nice to meet you" He extended his hand and I gladly shook it._

"_Do you know Evans dad owns his own law firm in California? And Blair's dad is a lawyer!?" Sophia questioned us. I knew she wanted to hook us up so I rolled my eyes at __her out there attempt._

_**That night Evan and I ran into each other when I was walking through the center headed back towards my dorm... We instantly hit it off. He was sophisticated... We first started off as good friends then it developed into something more. Evan was different from Chuck, and Nate. We connected on many levels... He loved the old classic movies, writing, politics, and he was a romantic. Evan was determined to become a journalist and his determination hooked me into wanting to become too. We dated a good month before it happened. On December 14**__**th**__** I found out I was pregnant with **__**Evan's**__** baby at the age of 19. I remember crying to Evan as he held me tight and comforted me.**_

"_Blair… marry me" He whispered into my ear._

_I looked up at him with a shocked and confused expression on my face. Was he really asking me to marry him? I am nineteen years old and knocked up. This was not how I wanted my life to play out. I was supposed to be carrying Chucks' baby and marrying him when I was done with college. When I wanted a change I didn't expect this. What could I say? I can't ever go back home everyone will know. He will know. He will be so disappointed in me. There was no going back now, Chuck would hate me and let alone half of the UES would think I am a huge slut._

"_Okay." I whispered as the tears that were brewing fell._

_**That was the start of a whole new life. I was carrying a child while being a freshman at Yale. About three weeks later we finally told our parents. When I called Eleanor she immediately disapproved and yelled at me for being "so stupid & irresponsible". She told me if I keep this baby I better find a way to pay for Yale because she wasn't. I won't forget crying to Sophie. She advised me to call my dad because maybe he would think differently. She was right. My dad was angry as hell at me but he said "I was still his baby girl and he wouldn't ever think of shutting me out". I knew I had to make a phone call that was more than over due.**_

"_Hello?" A voice questioned from the phone._

_I couldn't talk all I did was sob into the receiver._

"_Serena" I cried_

"_Blair what is wrong?" She asked me worried as hell._

"_I'm pregnant" I whispered._

**As soon as I told her she promised to be at Yale by the end of the night. This is what it took to get our friendship back.**

"_Blair" She whispered running to me as soon as she entered the hall that I was waiting for her in._

"_I'm so sorry Serena" I cry holding onto her for dear life._

"_Shh. I'm here." She whispered as she led me to the elevator._

_An hour later…_

"_What did his parents say?" She asked as we were on my bed._

"_They are going to let us stay at their New Haven house and help with everything. Daddy also said he would help me with anything." I said as the tears finally stopped._

"_Blair so are you going to marry him?"_

_I look up at my best friend who looked utterly worried and concerned for me. "Yes. It is my only option S. He's an amazing guy and... Chuck."_

"_And Chuck what B?"_

"_He wouldn't ever forgive me. Please S. I know this is going to be on Gossip Girl before we know it but… If you can tell him before anyone else... Please" I whispered._

_She pulled me into a warm hug._

_**From then on Evan and I made arrangements for our wedding which would be held in the town hall on Christmas Day. His parents figured it would be a good day to celebrate our union. It was a quiet ceremony with his friends and family on one side, Sophie, Serena and Dorota on my side. My daddy was held up in France helping Roman mourn the loss of his mother Katherine. Before the wedding I remember asking Serena if Chuck knew. All I wanted was for him to come in and save the day for me. Take me away from all the madness and have us just be together. **_

"_I'm sorry B." She whispered as I broke out in tears _

_Sophie and Serena ran and hugged me tight._

_**From then on Evan and I settled into his parents New Haven house quite comfortably. **__**We still kept up our normal school schedule with breaks to meet up and talk. As the months passed my belly started growing rapidly. Evan**__** was being an amazing husband. He and I decorated the nursery a beautiful blue for our baby boy that was**____**due in the fall. I was falling for Evan more and more as the days went on. No other guy in his position would ever be like this and I was grateful that I was with him. We would have annual Friday dinners where Sophie and her boyfriend John would come over, with Serena and Dan. Evan, John, and Dan hit it off at the start. They all were inspiring journalists.**_

_**On September 17**__**th**__**, Julian Mathews was born at 9:00 a.m**____**at**____**Hospital of Saint Raphael. He weighed in at 7 pounds. He had a beautiful full head of blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes. Evan and I were amazed at the beautiful little boy we had a part in creating. We couldn't have been any happier.**_

_**Boy was I wrong again. When Julian was born, Jane and John my in laws would come down and babysit Julian while Evan and I attended our classes. Then came the nights where Evan and I would argue non stop over stupid petty stuff like me wanting to take an extra course and him wanting me to be home so we wouldn't have his parents come down every other day. We got passed the arguments and then in 2,013 we both ended up graduating from Yale. We were blessed to have a little 4 year old baby boy, and to have accomplished our dreams we set out for ourselves in 2009. Then came graduation night when Evan told me he got offered a staff job for the Herald in Boston.**_

"_You what?" I whisper so I did not wake Julian._

"_I'm taking the job too Blair." He stated set strongly set on his decision._

_I looked up at him with an incredible look on my face._

"_So that's it? You already set your mind on leaving your wife and son behind?" I question my voice rising as I get up off the couch and dump my glass of wine down the sink._

"_Blair you and Julian would have the life. You wouldn't need to work." He tried reasoning with me. _

_I turn__around angrily "Evan how dare you do this! You knew I got offered that job at the New Haven Independent."_

_He shrugged "I am sorry Blair but I'm not declining the offer I've been dreaming about since before you."_

_  
"You are a coward you know that!? You know what, go to Boston and live a great life because my son is staying right here with me." I yell getting in his face._

"_Blair…. Come on I don't want this to turn into something huge." He pleaded as he followed me around the kitchen._

"_You made this into something big Evan. Julian and I are not going to Boston. You take it or you leave it."_

_He sighed as anger grew inside of him. "Fine then I guess I'll have my dad send over the divorce papers."_

_I couldn't believe this. My whole life came crashing down once again. I didn't just have to look out for myself this time around I had a loving four year old boy to look out for._

"_Great. You weren't even a father to that little boy. Who bought him his first basketball hoop? Or who played soccer with him in the backyard? It sure as hell wasn't you! His Uncle Dan is more of a father than you." I spat_

_He looked at me blankly as he headed for the door._

"_Now get out. When you come back or if you ever do Julian and I will not be here. You know where to reach me." I spat walking away from him as he opened the door and left our life._

_**So, that's how I ended up at my friends door step at 12 at night holding my sons hand waiting for someone to answer the door.**_

"_Momma why are we at Auntie and Uncles?" Julian questioned as I held him in my arms..._

"_Baby we're going to be here for awhile... Daddy went on a little vacation." I whisper to him as I rub his back so he can fall back to sleep. Before I knew it the door was open and I was faced with a worried sleepy Serena._

"_Blair what happened?" She whispered._

"_It's over" I whisper as she moves out the way for us to come inside._

_**Boy. Life back in the UES was going to be one hell of a ride...**_


End file.
